My son had recently watched Toy Story when I told him that one day he would grow up and be a man like Papa. His response was, "I don't want to grow up and be a man. I want to be a slinky dog!"
My husband and I sometimes use a rolling pin to massage each other's sore muscles. My 3 year old walked in to see my husband rolling me out and he says "Don't cook Mama! Mama doesn't fit in the oven!"
My son wanted to wear some chapstick, but he'd just finished telling me he had to go potty. I said I'd take him potty first and then he could wear some. He looks at me very seriously and says, "Don't put chapstick on my bum."
What kinds of things do your kids tell you?
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